“Mom! Mom! Mom!”
“Mom! Can we get a snow cone?”
“Honey, we’re driving home from the ice cream place!”
Your eyes flick up to the rearview mirror and you see tears welling in your little angel’s eyes.
Oh geez. Oh man. Fuck. Fucking shit.
“…but mom…I really want a snow cone…”
Nice. Your five year old future diabetic is about to throw the temper tantrum of the century unless you buy him sugar ice ten minutes after he shoveled a double chocolate brownie ice cream sundae down his throat – and that’s not going to happen. So what do you do?
That’s right. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for.
Last week, you and your husband trekked to a local car dealership and traded your ten year old Tahoe in for one of those new Honda Odysseys with a built in privacy divider designed specifically for moments like this.
You take one last glance at the pre-volcanic eruption tremors in your backseat just to confirm it’s actually about to be Mount St. Helens in this bitch. And it is. So you hold down a button and listen to the sleek noise of a 21st century soundproof divider rising a few inches behind your head. It’s one-way glass so you can still see everything going on back there, but you can’t hear a thing.
After five seconds, the sealing process is complete – now you can watch frantically waving arms and the face of a child hysterically wailing…but on mute.
You’re two minutes away from your house, but at this point why not keep driving? Take a lap or two around the city to let him get his screams out so nap time starts with a little less resistance!
Great idea, right?
Remember, 1% of profits from installation fees!